Since you can’t ask “What’s Your Penis Size,” people have come up with some rather interesting ways NOT to Size-up a Man’s Penis.
So let’s start with debunking the top 10 methods that are commonly used to guess the size of a man’s genitalia.
Top 10 Ways NOT to Size-up a Man’s Penise
#10 Digit Ratio
This method comes in at #10 because it’s still fairly new, and people are just starting to get a firm grip on it.
But give it time, even the best penis estimating methods starts out small and grow over time.
This one got its start after some Korean researchers took the measurements of 144 anesthetized men’s flaccid (but stretched out) penises, and then measuring their right index and ring fingers.
The results suggested that men with longer index fingers had shorter stretched penises.
This particular study was carried out on only Korean men who were about to undergo urological surgery.
Don’t ask, I didn’t look into this idiocy to find out if these measurements were taken consensually.
Sure, it may be fun for some Korean scientists to be yanking on an unconscious man’s penis, and then measuring his fingers.
But as far as gaining insight into a total stranger’s most intimate detail, they’re as clueless as their penis estimating method.
#9 Flaccid Length
Well, this one is beyond stupid, because if a man is so desperate to show a woman he doesn’t know his flaccid penis, I highly doubt it’ll be flaccid for long.
But nevertheless, the theory goes if the guy’s penis is small when flaccid, it’s probably going to stay small. And vice versa.
In reality, the size difference of a penis from soft to hard varies greatly. Or haven’t they heard that old Italian saying that goes “It’s for growing, not for showing”?
In fact, those with large flaccid penises tend to grow only by a little, while those with small flaccid penises usually grow substantially.
This also means anyone thinking of doing “urinal check-out” not only will it be a complete unreliable waste of time, but it’ll also probably save you from getting arrested.
#8 Gay or Straight
Like Race, rumors abound that gay men are somehow more endowed than heterosexuals.
But why is this? I believe this myth got its start after a few studies published the average length of a gay man to that of hetero.
Unfortunately, the only thing it proved was gay men were more willing to embellish their manhood than straight men.
It turns out leaving it up to the individual men to measure themselves and report their findings, isn’t such a great idea.
When researchers began to do the actual measuring the average overall penis length dropped almost an inch.
#7 Wrist to Tip of Middle Finger
Yep, another terrible way to determine a man’s penis size.
The myth here is that a man’s penile length is equal to the distance from the end of his wrist to the tip of his middle finger.
If this were in any way true, Shaq—with a hand length of about 11 inches, he’d have to wear his like a belt.
Since women with tape measures aren’t going around asking men to give them the middle finger. I assume not many of them have bought into this one.
Race can play a large factor in the prevalence of many stereotypes—both negative and positive.
A man’s race doesn’t always play a part in his penis size.
So forget all the stereotypes about Asians having small penises, Africans having large ones, and Caucasians being just average.
Men’s penises aren’t color-coded, despite some people would like to think so for obvious reasons.
#5 Having A Deep Voice
A deep voice can be alluring—but it’s still no indicator of penis size.
Yet, people think that a man with a deep voice will be packing a tuba.
Ask someone to tell you the first man who comes to mind that has a deep voice?
You’ll probably hear names such as Morgan Freeman, James Earl Jones, and Barry White,
And wouldn’t that be a coincidence after just reading #6.
And just like that “race” measuring myth, or a man shoving a sock in his underwear. The deep voice equals penis size theory is all just an illusion.
Scientifically, it probably has the most value than most penis estimating methods, but that’s not to say it actually works.
Height apparently has little to do with penile length.
Studies have found a correlation between height and penis size but these studies have been too small (no pun intended) to be considered evidence.
So, while it might seem like a good starting point to look for the tallest guy in the room, believing he will also be the most well endowed.
Then you’re probably only setting yourself up for a huge (pun intended) disappointment.
#3 Thumb Length
This method claims a man’s penis is three times the length of his thumb.
Why three times? Who knows.
Nevertheless, many wholeheartedly believe in this penis estimating method.
But like all the rest, it’s just another manhood size myth.
Now that you know, you can go back to concentrating on driving instead of working out the numbers in your head trying to figure out if that hitchhiker is worth doing a U-turn for.
#2 Thumb to Finger
This one starts off by having a man make an L shape with his index finger and thumb.
Then all you need to do is measure the distance between the tip of his trigger finger and the tip of his thumb to determine if he really is a LOSER!
Despite the odds that it’s probably around the same length.
It’s still not a reliable way of estimating what size gun he’s packing.
You’re simply playing the law of averages which means he could still be armed with anything from a pea shooter to a bazooka.
#1 Shoe Size
It’s only a myth, so stop hanging around Foot Locker looking for just the right size man to come along.
Judging a man’s manhood by his shoe size is probably one of the most common, and well-known methods people employ.
Women (and men) come up with convoluted equations in an attempt to find a link between the size of a guy’s feet and the length of his penis.
Yes, it seems logical that the two-body parts would somehow equate to one another, but unfortunately, they don’t